CHECK OUT MY HOARD!

Throughout Hi-Fi RUSH there's a variety of collectable items to, well, collect! These items vary in their usefulness gameplay-wise, but they all add something interesting to the game and its world. There are six types: life gauges, reverb cores, health tanks, Armstrong circuits, vlogs, and graffiti.

Click here to see where you can find all of the life gauge pieces! This will contain some spoilers and some knowledge of the games tracks, so if you haven't beaten the game, I would advise against looking at this. Track 1: A Fresh Start After the beat hit tutorial, go into the next room, then turn into the room on the right. The piece is on top of the shipping containers on the right side. After the fight on the roof, hop across the platforms to get to the other roof, then around to get to the upper level. From there, you can jump over to the tower that the piece is on. At the end of the track, before you go into the boss fight, climb up to the balcony on the right side of the room. Go to the end of this balcony, and you'll find the piece between two containers. Track 2: Power Up In the room where you have to climb up to reach the first jump pad, before you go into the room where the jump pad is, get up onto one of the moving containers. From there, you can jump up onto the catwalk above, and then up onto the beams above that. The piece is up there on the upper right side. In the area where you hit a valve, then use Peppermint to shoot more valves so you can grapple up to the top, once you reach the top, go to the left. There's a HA-K0 there that, upon completing the mini-game to open it, will give you the piece. From the HA-K0, walk up the catwalks to the door that leads forward. Before you go through that door, talk to the SCR-UB in front of it. It'll give you a side-mission to shoot three flocks of pigeons using Peppermint. Once you do that, talk to the SCR-UB again, and it will give you this piece as a reward. Track 3: Trial By (Volcanic) Fire In the waiting room for the third test chamber, climb up onto the wall divider behind the secretary. From there, you can platform over to the roof of the small chamber that a test is being ran in in the corner of the room. That's where you'll find the piece. Can only be gotten after beating the game. Beating the SPECTRA challenge in this track rewards you with this piece. After you ride the rail, before you go into the next R&D area, turn right. You'll find the piece next to the shipping containers. Track 4: Less Budget, More Problems Once you reach the top of the drill to get back to where you were at the end of the last track, climb up the shipping containers to get on top of the building nearby. The piece is up there. After the first AR room, when you walk back down into the caves, before you grapple back to the labs, go left, towards the three big buckets of gears, then continue past them and drop down to the bit of rock below. The piece is there. During the last AR section, after Zanzo's hologram appears and he has the volcano programmed in, go left. You'll find the piece on a rock ledge. Track 5: Breaking Out At the beginning, as you're platforming towards the platform on the other side of the big gap, when you jump over to the second pillar with moving platforms, go to the back of that pillar. There's a platform you can jump up to, which the piece is on. In the main room, before you go off to do the first node, talk to the TEC-78. They have a side-mission for you that requires you to find 10 drone packages throughout the track. Once you find all ten, go back and talk to the TEC-78 again, and they'll reward you with this piece. Can only be found after beating the game. After you break through the Z-shielded wall to get into the route that leads up to Security Node 1, go left, through the fire gate. Follow the path forward and up, then go up the slide and keep going forward. You'll find the piece right before the drop-off that leads to the way back down. Track 7: The Climb During the first 2D section, when you ride the moving platform up, wait for it to go up again. Then, jump to the ledge to the left. Press the button there, then drop back down to the platform below. A bit of wall has been moved there, allowing you to get into the cranny that the piece is in. After the fight against the WA-ES-2 and two GNR-020s, continue forward to the Z-shielded wall and break through it. Go through the door ahead, then go left and jump up, on top of the servers near the wall. From there, you can climb up into the area above, which has a HA-K0 that you have to open in order to get the piece. Can only be gotten after beating the game. In the big room full of pillars, before you go up the stairs to the left, go forward, down the ramp and then around the big pillar to the generator next to said pillar's doorway. After you overheat it, platform up to the ledge at the top to get to the piece. Can only be gotten after beating the game. Beating the SPECTRA challenge in this track rewards you with this piece. Track 8: A History Lesson In the first area of the track, there's a SCR-UB you can talk to in the upper area that has a side-mission for you, in which you have to hit some trash cans in order to find a golden can. Once you find the can, you'll get teleported back to the SCR-UB and rewarded with this piece. After you have Macaron punch the SES-103 model in the catwalks above the museum, grapple over to the next platform. From there, you can drop down onto the shield of the model, and then jump onto the floating platform next to it to get the piece. Climb up the displays in the room where Chai tells Mimosa to shut up and go through the vent, then turn into the room on the right. There's a HA-K0 in there that you have to open in order to get this piece. Track 9: Take the Stage After climbing over the gated off area, turn around. The piece is right behind you. Track 10: A Master Plan After Roquefort makes the floor disappear and you drop down, turn around and jump over the pipes to get into the area where you'll find this piece. In the atrium, before you press the button, climb up the platforms on the right to get to the area above. Jump through the hole in the second wooden fence, and you'll find the HA-K0 you have to open to get this piece. When you go out onto the balcony of the first office in the atrium, before you climb up the AC units, go behind the crates. There, you'll find the piece.
	Life Gauges Life gauges increase your maximum HP. You have to find and collect four pieces of one in order to make a whole gauge—though you can also buy whole ones in the store. They're power cores made by Vandelay Technologies to power Project Armstrong robotics. By design, they fail at the 6 month mark exactly a minute past the warranty period.
	Reverb Cores Reverb cores increase your maximum reverb. You have to find and collect four pieces of one in order to make a whole core—though you can also buy whole ones in the store. They're prototype batteries that were made to keep the Project Armstrong power cores charged longer. However, they actually make them wear out even faster. They're also incredibly dangerous, as they don't have any protective covering.
Click here to see where you can find all of the reverb core pieces! This will contain some spoilers and some knowledge of the games tracks, so if you haven't beaten the game, I would advise against looking at this. Track 1: A Fresh Start When you first enter the big room with all the conveyor belts and crushers, go all the way to the right, past the button. Keep going until you reach the end of the conveyor, then go right again onto a small catwalk area. You'll find the piece there. Track 2: Power Up In the room with the CAR-11E and the stack of crates and boxes that leads up to the vent you need to go through to progress through the track, climb up the boxes and then turn to the right. There's a catwalk you can jump to. On that catwalk, behind some machinery, is the piece. After you jump down from the vent with the SCR-UB in it into an arena, once you finish the fight, go up the ramp on the right side of the room, and then turn left. Once you break the boxes there, you'll find the piece. Track 3: Trial By (Volcanic) Fire Can only be gotten after beating the game. Near a small camp where a PGR-0101 and a VA-SER are talking, behind the two bots is a Z-Shielded wall. Once you break through this wall and walk inside, you'll see the piece on a mound of dirt. In lab 44, go to the far right, up the yellow staircase, then around the servers. The piece is there, right next to the glass wall. Track 4: Less Budget, More Problems Can only be gotten after beating the game. Beating the SPECTRA challenge in this track rewards you with the piece. Track 5: Breaking Out When you enter the room that leads to security node 2, go to the left, up the boxes. The piece is in the little area up there. Going along the path to security node 1, you'll eventually get into a fight against a SES-103, a SBR-001, and a GNR-020. After you beat this fight, go down the path on the right side of the arena to the Z-shielded door. Break through that, then jump up onto the servers inside of the room it leads to. The piece is on top of the ones along the back wall. Track 7: The Climb In the big hallway where there's a TEC-78 trapped behind the glass, there are some platforms you can jump up onto. Get onto the first one on the right side near the far wall, and from there make your way up to the small upper area that they lead to. There, you'll find SEB-AAA, JSF-001, a vending machine, and, most importantly, the piece. Track 8: A History Lesson After the introductory fight of the BL-1Z5 outside of the museum, go through the gate on the left, then turn left and walk down all the way until you have to turn left again. At the end of that fenced area, you'll find the piece. After the fight in the room with the generator, leave that room and make your way along the path, past the two electric panels on the floor. Then, turn right and jump over the pipe into a hall with a some more electric panels. Make your way to the end of this hall, jump over the pipe there, and you'll be at the piece. Track 10: A Master Plan After you punch the Kale statue's head off, grapple over to the broken off arm, then turn around and fall down to the area below. The piece is right in front of a stack of health boxes.
	Health Tanks Health tanks give you a second chance in dire combat situations. You have to find and collect five pieces of one in order to make a whole tank—though you can also buy whole ones in the store. After you've gotten a whole one, you have to fill it up with health, which can only be done by getting health pick-ups when at max HP. Once it's full, it'll be automatically used whenever you run out of HP, giving you some health back and preventing you from dying.
Click here to see where you can find all of the health tank pieces! This will contain some spoilers and some knowledge of the games tracks, so if you haven't beaten the game, I would advise against looking at this. Track 1: A Fresh Start After the introductory fight to the GNR-020, go forward, into the next area, then climb up the containers and onto the moving platform that takes you across to the next platform. Upon reaching it, go up the ramp to the right. Then, interact with the HA-K0 there and complete the minigame in order to unlock it so you can get the piece. Track 2: Power Up Can only be found after beating the game. Beating the SPECTRA challenge in this track rewards you with the piece. Track 3: Trial by (Volcanic) Fire At the beginning of the little area that leads to the rail that takes you to the introductory fight of the SEN-C0, when you first drop down, go left, then left again. It's behind some boxes. Track 4: Less Budget, More Problems Before climbing up the drill, while you're on the circular platform at the bottom, go to the right. There's an area you can platform to from there. Following the path will lead you to an area full of crates, boxes, and barrels. Use them to climb up to the area above. The HA-K0 that has the piece is there. After breaking through the Z-shielded wall after the second AR room, you'll be back inside the building. Go to the pipes that slant downwards on the right, and jump and dash from there to get the piece. Track 5: Breaking Out Can only be found after beating the game. Beating the SPECTRA challenge in this track rewards you with the piece. Track 7: The Climb After the first 2D section, keep going forward until you reach the Z-shielded wall. Break through that wall, then go to the upper right corner of the room, where the stack of crates is. Use those to climb up to the ledge above, where the piece is. Track 8: A History Lesson Before you go up through the hole in the ceiling that leads to the side route to the museum entrance, go past the two CAR-11Es towards the stacks of boxes. The piece is behind said boxes. During the first generator platforming section, as you're climbing up, jump over to the pipes on the left. It's in the small room there. Track 10: A Masterplan In the office you have to break a Z-shielded wall to get into, walk toward the exit, then go left. Past the boxes there is a door, which leads to a room full of gears with some shelves. Jump on top of these shelves to get to the piece.
	Armstrong Circuits Armstrong circuits are used to make and upgrade chips. Unlike the other collectables, some of these can only be obtained by completing specific achievements for the Wall of Fame. They're damaged components from Project Armstrong implants. How they got that way and how they wound up scattered about Vandelay is unknown—and, quite frankly, a bit concerning.
Click here to see where you can find and how to get all of the circuits! This will contain some spoilers and some knowledge of the games tracks, so if you haven't beaten the game, I would advise against looking at this. Track 1: A Fresh Start All of these can only be gotten after beating the game. Before you go into the area where Chai and 808 first meet, turn around. There's a magnet with a barrier on it you can shoot. Grapple to it, then talk to SEB-AAA twice. The second time, he'll give you the circuit. Beating the SPECTRA challenge in this track rewards you with the circuit. Break through the Z-shielded door on the other side of the gap that the moving platform takes you to, overheat the generator inside, then platform up. Once you get on top of the crane, jump to the platforms on the left and then go up into the area that they lead to. At the top of this space is a HA-K0, which the circuit is inside of. Before you go into the QA-1MIL fight, use the platform to the left to climb up to the balcony. Blow out the fire gate, then climb up the stack of boxes to the far right to get to the balcony in the room the gate leads to. The circuit's at the end of said balcony. Track 2: Power Up All of these can only be gotten after beating the game. Before you grapple over to the fight where you're taught about using your magnet in battle, drop down to the right. There's a little area with a Z-shielded door. The circuit's in the room behind that door. After the fight mentioned in the previous circuit's directions, make your way down the catwalk, towards the boxes at the end. Part way to them, turn right, and grapple to the room above. Blow out the fire gate and turn right. You'll have to platform across the moving shipping containers to get to it. After the fight against the SBR-001s and GNR-020s, continue into the hallway. There's a fire gate at the corner; blow it out, then make your way through the room to the HA-K0 inside. In the room with the two VA-SERs and a jump pad, there's a Z-shielded door on the right wall. Break through it, then jump up onto the little balcony in the room it leads to. After you get to the other side of the room with the water and moving platforms you have to activate, make your way down the hall until you reach the corner. Blow out the fire gate there, then make your way through the room to the HA-K0 inside. Track 3: Trial By (Volcanic) Fire After you shoot the rock formation down, jump across the lava river. On the other side is a rock platform that moves up and down on a lava geyser. Wait for it to fall, then jump down. There's a small alcove with some gears and ledges you can climb. The circuit is on the top most ledge. When you get up to the cliff where Chai comments on the view, go to the left. The circuit is near the edge. After the introductory fight of the SEN-C0, leave the arena and then turn left. Tt's near some boxes and barrells. When you get to R&D, turn around and go down the ramp to the platform below. Then jump over to the rock ledge behind the vending machine. It's on the ledge next to that one. To the left of the R&D entrance is a small area that's sectioned off by glass. Jump over this glass to get the circuit. When you first enter the big room that takes you to the second test chamber, go left. The circuit's right there. Track 4: Less Budget, More Problems After you break through the Z-shielded door that teaches you about that mechanic, go left and then left again into the office/lab space. The circuit is between two desks in the upper part of it. When you get to the drill, go around to the left side. There are two rock platforms that rise and fall from the lava. Use them to get across to the area on the other side, then go up the ramp; it's dead ahead. When you get back up to R&D, go straight left and past the Zanzo cut-out. It's in the corner there. After the first AR room, when you walk back down into the caves, before you grapple back to the labs, the circuit is on a rock outcropping next to some boxes. Before you break the Z-shielded door that takes you into the big room that leads to the third AR room, turn around. There's an AC unit and some pipes you can platform across to get to the large pipe that the circuit is on Track 5: Breaking Out After the TEC-78 finishes talking to you, go right. There's a platform you can drop down onto that leads to a bunch of circular platforms that are moving around the center pillar. Use them to make your way down to the platform to the left; the circuit's there. In the circular area with the elevator in the center, you can climb to the catwalks above by jumping on a server. Once up there, make your way over to the catwalk on the far right side. After you finish activating the second node, before you use the jump pad to get back up, jump onto the boxes to the right of it and then up onto the glass bit above. The circuit is to the right. As you make your way up to node one, before you grapple to the platforms that lead up to a fight and after you leave the room with the sliding platforms, go left. It's right next to some boxes. Can only be gotten after beating the game. After the fight in front of node one's room, go to the right and jump across the sliding platforms. Go through the door they lead to, overheat the generator inside, then use the platforms provided. At the end of the section, you'll be in a room full of fans. Follow the path and you'll find the circuit. Behind node one is a platform you can jump down onto which has some barrells and the circuit. Once you get past the first set of lasers in the vent, jump up to the left, and then go all the way up into the little office space. You'll pick it up as you enter. It's on the left side behind node three. Track 6: L.I.F.T. Me Up At the very beginning of the track, turn around and jump over the elevator controls. It's near the far wall. Track 7: The Climb In the construction area at the beginning of the track, before you start climbing up the scaffolding, drop down from the shipping containers near the edge of the L.I.F.T. platform. The circuit is right next to the handrail. At the top of the scaffolding, before you grapple over to the Z-shielded door, jump to the right, onto the pipe there. The circuit's at the end of the trail of gears. During the second 2D section, when you get onto the elevator after the sliding platforms, look behind you. The circuit is on a small ledge at the top. When you come out of the second 2D section, go past the TEC-78 that's lying on the ground and jump around the glass wall. The circuit is on some crates back there. In the big room where they continue discussing how to get Korsica's passkey, go up the stairs and then jump to the right, onto the ledge around the pillar. Get onto the one around the other pillar, and from there there's a platform you can jump to. The circuit's at the end of it. After the fight against the HG-0M and the SBR-001s at the top of the jump pad, go up the ramp and then to the right. Jump across the gap to get to the platform the circuit's on. When you get to the ledge along the center pillar that has the elevator that isn't a 2D section, go to the right, past the elevator. The circuit's at the end of the path. There's a platform with a jump pad that you grapple up to. Before you use the pad, go down the path on the other side of it. The circuit's there. Track 8: A History Lesson When you reach the area with the SCR-UB who gives you a side-mission, go to the right. There's a bathroom there that you can climb onto using some boxes. The circuit's on top of it. As you make your way forward after the fire gate tutorial, you eventually have to drop down. When you do, turn around. After the introductory fight of the BL-1Z5 in front of the museum, go to the gate on the right side, then turn right and follow that path all the way. After you drop down from the vent that leads into the back area with the robot models, go all the way down the hall. After you grapple past the two pendulums to the fire gate that leads to the hanging cat walks, go into the room on the right. The circuit's behind some boxes in there. After the introductory fight of the GNR-FL0 and SBR-CUR, jump to the next catwalk, then go to the one on the right. The one that one leads to has a bunch of shipping containers and the circuit on it. When you reach the Z-shielded door that leads into the final arena, turn around and platform up the pipes. Once you reach the third set, go left. Can only be gotten after beating the game. Beating the SPECTRA challenge in this track rewards you with the circuit. Track 9: Take the Stage As you go down the hall, you'll reach an area where you need to climb up some boxes to continue. Instead of doing that, go forward into the space full of boxes. It's in the far back there. In the first part of the 2D section, when you have to jump up to get to the stack of boxes that leads to progress, jump the other way. It's behind a box and a barrell. Track 10: A Master Plan When you come out of the vent that leads to the Z-shielded door and the locked one, it's to the right of the latter. After the fight against the ARM-D11, go up the stairs, through the doorway, and then to the right. It's behind some boxes. Once you get to the atrium, go towards the button, then go right and jump up the platforms there. The circuit's between two hedges on the balcony those platforms lead to. Can only be gotten after beating the game. Beating the SPECTRA challenge in this track rewards you with the circuit. When you land after the first rail section, turn around. In the office with the Z-shielded door, go into the sectioned off area to the right with the couches and coffee table. it's in the corner behind them. When you get to finance, walk towards the doors until you reach where the first set of pillars are, then go left. Follow the row of golden pillars down a narrow path to the circuit. Wall of Fame All of these give two chips each. Barrier Breaker Lvl. 2 De-shielding Lvl. 1 Deflector Lvl. 1 Release That Energy! Lvl. 2 A Little Help From My Friends Lvl. 2 Jam Combo Link Double Team Jam Combo Link Always in Rhythm Lvl. 2 A Mighty Wind Lvl. 1 & Lvl. 2 Aerial Raving! Lvl. 2 We're Jammin' Lvl. 2 Law of Attraction Lvl. 2 Combo Pro Lvl. 2 Stock Up! Lvl. 2 I'm Not Paying For This! Lvl. 2 Golden Boy The Sky is Lava Data Harmony Nice Catch! Party Crasher Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Accountant?
Vlogs Vlogs are notes, messages, emails, and announcements that have been left open on tablets and other machinery throughout Vandelay by employees. They offer insight into the world and its characters. There are more of these than any other type of collectable in the game, with there being 77 total—at least, those are the ones that are required in order to get the achievement. There are a some that don't count towards said achievement that can be found in a post-game area that can only be unlocked by beating all the arcade machine challenges. Click here to see where you can find all of the vlogs! This will contain some spoilers and requires having some knowledge of the games tracks, so if you haven't beaten it, I would advise against looking at this. Track 1: A Fresh Start TO ALL EMPLOYEES!: After the fight on the roof and the following cutscene, when you get to the other roof, go up the ramp. To the right you'll see some boxes and crates. Behind those boxes and on top of one of the crates is where you'll find the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! REKKA HERE! THIS IS IMPORTANT SO ALL CAPS THIS TIME! KALE'S VISITING THE FACILITY AND REKKA KNOWS ALL YOU GRIMY GREASEHANDS ARE FIXING YOUR NUTS AND BOLTS TO GET THINGS WORKING, BUT REKKA WANTS THIS PLACE SHININ' ON ARMSTRONG DAY. AND SOMEONE SPELL-CHECK THOSE ARMSTRONG SCANNERS! YOU HEAR THAT VOICE? THAT'S THE CROWD CHEERING WHEN THOSE ARMSTRONG UNITS ARE PUMPIN' OUT TO THE PUBLIC. AND WHEN REKKA GETS HER NICE BONUS AT THE END OF THE FISCAL, REKKA'LL BE SURE TO NAME-CHECK YOU ALL IN THAT MILLISECOND BEFORE REKKA KICKS BACK AND GIVES HERSELF A ROUND OF APPLAUSE. Battery Pack Production: In the room after the elevator that takes you down and out from the 2D section, near the vent that you drop down through is an operating machine with chairs in front of it. The vlog is on this machine. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! RE: Production Order from R&D. PGR-0101 unit #31340 over at the labs. Zanzo wants this unit out there for sale today, even though he thought of the idea yesterday... Product Name: Expanded battery pack for Project Armstrong power units. By design, thebattery is made to fail that the 6-month mark (exactly a minute past the warranty period). Zanzo wants to put out this battery supercharger to...help that...? I don't know what he wants anymore. You didn't hear it from me, but all it does his mess up the charge and wear it out faster. FYI this thing is like a lightning rod. Zanzo didn't want any protective covering since it "looked cooler." Wear rubber gloves or something. Old-gen EOL Reminder: After the introductory fight of the GNR-020s, a gate will open up, letting you walk into a large, fenced-in area. In the upper left corner of this area is where the vlog is. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! RE: VANDELAY TECH REPURPOSING Orders requesting all "End of Life" Vandelay robotics to be brought to production and used for scrap to make new models. Even the tech that we are still using. Not sure why, since they work fine, but apparently this is coming from Kale himself. But I don't ask the questions, I just write the notices! Also it should be noted that my series is also due to be scrapped, so I guess this is goodbye! I'm writing this from a conveyer belt, so I just wanted to— EMAIL SENT AUTOMATICALLY RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: Get on this!: After the introductory fight of the BA-B00's and the stun gauge mechanic, head down the catwalk to the left of where you first walked into the arena. Following it all the way, you'll find the vlog on the platform you have to jump to get to at the end. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Hello Mr. Roquefort. I think you may have sent this to me accidentally... -------RECEIVED MESSAGE BELOW------- Kale — look at what I have to deal with. ////Conversation log between ROQUEFORT and REKKA >>>>ROQUEFORT: Just tell me we are goig to hit those Q4 delivery numbers. >>>>REKKA: REKKA'LL GET ER DONE! >>>>ROQUEFORT: Can you stop yelling. >>>>REKKA: CAPSLOCK IS BROKEN! REKKA WORKS HARD AND TYPES HARD >>>>ROQUEFORT: I dont' care how "hard" you work. If those units aren't out the door we won't make the Q4 forecast. >>>>REKKA: THEN TELL ZANZO TO STOP COMING IN SO HOT WITH THE DESIGNS >>>>ROQUEFORT: Design is his porblem, MAKING them is yours! >>>>REKKA: DON'T MESS. REKKA GOT THE ARMSTRONG LINE UP AND RUNNING IN 17 HOURS! WHILE YOU'RE COUNTING BILLS REKKA'S SMASHING RIVETS! >>>>ROQUEFORT: You don't smash rivets... >>>>ROQUEFORT: Look, all your "hype" talk better live up to it... ------ O5-KAR Unit Musings: In the room before the boss fight, go to the right of the ramp that leads up to the fight. The vlog is on the machine there. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////PERSONAL NOTE FROM O5-KAR #516 [ I'm getting hte feeling that us O5-KAR series are getting overlooked. Back when we were in charge of QA, we made sure the quality was there, but also we saw if things could be fixed! A dent in the body? Replace it, since everything's fine! A light not working? Again, just fix it. But now, with 1MIL, it's all or nothing. Even a scratch and there's nothing but a crater left behind. QA should INSPECT something, it doesn't need rocket launchers! My...how things have changed around here. ] Track 2: Power Up Unsent Complaint: Before you go into the production building, take a left into a side-area full of shipping containers. On the other side of the containers near the entrance is where the vlog is. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Email Draft Unsetn from O4-KAR 1D# 671993 To the HR department, I don't want to make a disturbance, but being that I am in charge of taking care of the production central garden I am curious over the reason for its existence. Our ads tell people that it is for interoffice communication, but employees are requested to NOT go into the garden. This is confusing for the employees since it is beautified, but never used. Never mind the amount of work I and the cleanup team put into making it look immaculate. Also, I am questioning the intent of the world's largest hedge maze inside this as well... HR Auto-Surveillance Recording:Once you reach the large room in production that has the giant machine in the center, follow the catwalks into the room nearby. The machine right next to one of the entrances has the vlog on it. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Auto-recorded dialogue converted to text from VA-SER #734144 [Submitted to HR department per Vandelay HR Rules] ///// (Audibly paranoid tone) "Well, finally got this whole room automated. Makes me think...once us robots finish automating the production line, what happens to our positions? Are we gonna lose them to some machines who automate...better than we automate? But then how much more automatic can automation get? Am I getting scrapped over this?" [ROBOT SOBBING SOUNDS CONTINUE FOR 25 MINUTES] HR Claim #324839028555180850195: After the introductory fight of the ES-101s, walk all the way down the catwalk towards where the health boxes are. Drop down onto one of the shipping containers below, and wait for it to take you to another catwalk. This catwalk will take you into a small room, where the vlog is located. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Thank you [Valuable Employee] for submitting your claim to HR. Please wait approximately 8 months for a reply. /////// Original Message from CAR-11E #50150 ------ "Hi, don't want to make a big deal out of this, but I noticed that most paths around here involve jumping or using magnetic force to avoid falling into oblivion. I know this was part of Rekka's "Get Fit" plan of requiring us to put more energy into our routines, but for us old Vandelay models, we literally are trapped in here. Also, if possible, please send help. I've been trapped here for ages." Tram Line Issues: After the room where Rekka yells at you and then you have to fight a bunch of robots, go down the hallway and then to the left. The vlog is behind and next to some stacks of boxes. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! TO: all-production@vandelay From: Rekka@vandelay HEY REKKA HERE! FIRST OF ALL, WHAT'S WITH ALL THESE TRAM LINES BREAKING DOWN? AND WHATEVER THE REASON, THE ANSWER IS "DOESN'T MATTER, FIX IT." REKKA DIDN'T GET TO THE TOP BY MAKING EXCUSES. REKKA GOT TO THE TOP BY GETTING THINGS DONE,E VEN IF IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. SO TAKE YOUR OPINIONS OR FACTS OR WHATEVER AND REKKA AIN'T KNOW! ALSO, THIS MAKES REKKA THINK WE NEED MORE TRAM LINES, SO FIND SOME SPACE! Introducing "The Arrow!": After the Peppermint button assist tutorial, on the platform that you now can reach, you'll find the vlog on a crate in the center of the platform. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! WEEKLY MARKETING COMPANY BLAST EMAIL Introducing "THE ARROW" brought to you by Vandelay They said it couldn't be done, but our top-nothc legal counsel headed with a campaign by Mimosa has allowed Vandelay exclusive rights as the sole owner of "THE ARROW," or what anyone would consider a direction-pointing symbol. Now, whenever someone gets lost and you see an arrow, you can tell your friends, "That's not just an arrow, that's the Vandelay arrow!" As such, to hold on to the image of the sole patent owner of the symbol synonymous with direction, I want to see that arrow everywhere! No one will get lost on our camus with "THE ARROW" showing them the way! Behind The Showmanship: Sitdown With Rekka: In the reception area before the boss fight, you'll find the vlog on a bench. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Exceprt from exclusive interview with Vandelay Technologies production head REKKA -The output Vandelay has seen lately has been staggeringly impressive. REKKA: IT AIN'T ENOUGH! -Well, I don't know how you compete with an on average 300% production increase every quarter for the past 5 years. REKKA: AND YOU THINK THAT'S GOOD? REKKA'LL SAY IT AGAIN: IT AIN'T ENOUGH. BUT THAT'S WHY YOU'RE JUST WRITING ARTICLES AND NOT STANDING WHERE REKKA IS. -It was a compliment, Miss- Owww, did you just...slap me in the face?- REKKA: REKKA SURE DID, AND SHE'LL DO IT AGAIN IF YOU THROW ANOTHER "MISS" IN THERE. -You can't just go around slapping reporters—- REKKA: REKKA DOES WHAT REKKA WANTS, AND ONCE PROJECT ARMSTRONG TAKES THE WORLD BY STORM, YOU'LL BE ASKING FOR SLAPS JUST TO GET ANOTHER INTERVIEW! Track 3: Trial By (Volcanic) Fire R&D Service Log: Part 1: After the first fight, jump over the black-and-yellow striped fence near the tall metal one. The vlog is on top of a stack of planks there. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ::///Service Robot log: Day 1 9:03 Here we go, first day in the game. I may just be a service robot, but by the end of this, I'll be calling the shots. Sure, they have me posting arrows around the construction site, but hey, people need to know where to go! First, I show them where to go, next thing...I'm telling them where to go! Just wish the rock area was a bit more stbale. R&D Service Log: Part 2: After the introductory fight of the SEN-C0s, follow the path forward until you reach a camp. Near some bunk beds, on one of the desks in this camp is where the vlog is. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ::///Service Robot log: Day 1 10:25 Maybe a bit over my head here. Got a lot of arrows. And I mean A LOT. Actually don't know what to do with all of them. Way more than I need, but I won't let them go to waste. What's easier to understand where to go? One arrow or TEN ARROWS? I already overheard my work being noticed. "Lotta arrows around here..." Yup, that's me. ANd you know what? I bet THAT GUY ain't lost! Wor'd spreading, and soon enough, I'm there at the top. R&D Service Log: Part 3: After the fight on the other side of the rising and falling lava geysers, up the ramps is a stack of crates. On one of these crates is the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! :://Service Robot log: Day 1 13:30 Phew, placing arrows near the volcano: NOT SAFE, let me tell you. But you know what's even worse? Getting lost, not knowing where to go after you've reached the volcano. I'm not just doing a service here, I'm basically running the place at this point! People look to the arrows with respect. Find one person here that isn't amazed by the pure brilliant subtlety of the placement of these things. The angle, the pivot, the subtle roll. This is basically art at this point. And I can't see anyone filling these shoes. R&D Service Log: Part 4: Jump across the gap via the rocks near the last vlog. This one is next to the broken robot that's behind the yellow-and-black striped rail. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! :://Service Robot log: Day 1 13:55 What was it all for? All these arrows to lead to...a rail? We can't even use this! It's like I was put on this planet for someone else. Like these arrows weren't for me but for some greater being. "Those who come next." I slipped on a loose rock, ankle ball joint is messed up. This may be my last sign, better make it count. This is the way out of here. Don't lose hope. ANd don't get too involved in the job. I already sense it, my replacement... I'll be lost in time, forgotten, but I'll have shown the way. And that's what counts. Zanzo's Order Request: Before going into R&D, go to the left, down the ramp to a lower area. On one of the benches in this area is the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ORDER REQUEST: 0577120 Filed By: Zanzo Looks clowns, I don't care if this door isn't connected to anything yet. I want this entrance looking PERFECT, so install this door ASAP. People (ESPECIALLY KALE) come to visit R&D and the first thing they see is an unfinished entrance...what does that say about us? THAT WE ARE HALF-BAKED! THAT WE DON'T HAVE A VISION! You only get one first impression (or two if my next idea pans out), so don't make me look bad! -Z LU-C1LLE Self-Therapy Journal: Behind the receptionist in the entrance area that leads up to the labs in R&D, there's a desk that has the vlog on it. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Journal Entry 1 (And last) ‹sarcasm› What a fantastic promotion ‹/sarcasm› They put me as a greeter. Like anyone is even going to visit this place. Not only that, they want me to push sales of these Zanzo plushies. Even these things are low-quality garbage. Not that we wouldn't have gone this route anyway, but if Roxanne was stil here, these plushies would be top-quality goods. ANd probably be free. My self-therapy AI is telling me to stay positive, but even I'm not dumb enough to believe that. We're pretty much doomed unless some ragtag group of weirdos decides to take the company head-on. Or we get bought out. I'll place my bets on the latter. Barrier Technology Test Results: In lab 44, go to the left of the staircase. The vlog is on a computer to the right of the PGR-0101 conducting the test. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////Test # 7809200 [Barrier technology upgrade.] ----- We've successfully enhanced barriers to resist friendly fire attacks, rain, and the occasional oil accident. Comments: - I noticed there is no OFF feature on personal barriers. Thus prohibiting barrier type units from personally shutting them off. This makes for some very awkward situations, like being unable to wash hands (unsanitary). Small doorways are also high-risks scenarios. Punch-to-face Test Results: In lab 44, go to the right of the staircase. The vlog is on the computer to the left of the PGR-0101 conducting the test. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////Test # 00000001 [Punch to face test Punch-to-face test continues to be effective in...proving SBR units can successfully get punched in the face. Comments: - Being the first test we've ever commissioned, I find it strange we have it running on a loop this long. We aren't learning anything new here. - The sadistic part of my circuitry wants to strike the last comment from the record. Watching this thing fly is hilarious. And any visitors to the lab seem to love it. - We need more data. Let's continue the test. Offensive Capabilities Test: Above the receptionist in the waiting room for the second test chamber is a metal ledge. On this ledge is where you'll find the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////Test # 0004578 ["Weaponry" test] Accuracy and damage test continues. Although Vandelay has yet to outwardly imply our robots have offensive capabilities, we continue to monitor their use against other robots. Comments: - Test SBR unit has successfully been calibrated to have memory reset every 5 seconds, therefore rendering its response genuine, and preventing "complaints" after repeated testing. Barrier Umbrella Test: In the waiting area for the third test chamber, next to the entrance of this area and across from the receptionist is a test room with a PGR-0101 and a machine in front of it. The vlog is on the machine. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////Test # 0037835 [Barrier Umbrella] There continue to be flaws in the barrier umbrella test. SEN-C0 unit continues to purposely exploit barrier technology to entrap participants rather than cover them. Apparently, this is an inherent flaw in the robot's personality, officially recorded as being "super weird." Comments: -Perhaps equipping the "companion" robot SEN-C0 series with an emotionally unstable AI does not fit with its intended purpose. -I dread bringing this up, since the "unstable" AI profile was deemed "hilarious" (actual quote) by Zanzo himself. Test Lab Assistance Email: After the third test chamber, past the LU-C1LLE and down the stairs, go through the door and to the left. Between the two decorative plants is a destroyed robot and the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ///Email returned to sender: testhelp@vandelay does not exist/// Emailing on behalf of unit who has completed the test protocol. I seem to be the only here and, day I say, unanticipated? There are no signs of any robot coming this way in a long time, and the door to the next area doesn't open. I looked up the floor plans and it seems like there is nothing behind this wall. Where am I supposed to go? I will wait until hopefully the next test subject arrives to continue speculating on the situation. Please reply with advice. Track 4: Less Budget, More Problems Staffing Allocation Complaint: After smashing through the Z-shielded wall, go the right and then to the left, into the lab area. On one of the desks on the left side of this lab is the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////MAIL SENT TO issues@vandelayHR//// I noticed an overflow of projects being announced in R&D without consideration to our staffing. We only have so many designers and programmers who don't seem to be allocated to each project's needs. My suggestions: - Rescope projects to fit around the needs of the company or each project's ideal size - Hire or create additional help when needed - STOP ZANZO FROM TAKING EVERY SINGLE UNIT AVAILABLE FOR HIS OWN PERSONAL PROJECTS. WE HAVE THINGS WE WANT TO DO HERE AS WELL. Thank you Auto-Saved Private Message: Before you punch the giant rock out of the way, turn around and climb up to the upper area there. On the ground, near the edge closest to the lava is the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////PERSONAL NOTE FROM VA-SER #84144 [ I should be annoyed at working in this lava pit. I mean the fact that they have to drill even deeper into the lava to even get energy running through this facility...pretty crazy to think this is only a fraction of what Zanzo has planned. But I shouldn't care, they gave me this cool drill arm for drillin'! I can break through rocks all day. No hazard gear, but it doesn't matter, you won't see me fallin'- RECLAIMED AUDIO CONVERTED TO TEXT: "AHHHHHHH" Disgruntled Decaf Revenge: Before climbing up the drill, while you're on the circular platform at the bottom, go to the right. There's an area you can platform to from there. Following the path will lead you to an area full of crates, boxes, and barrels. At the back of this area, on one of the crates, is the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////OPEN NOTE FILE [ I guess this is their way of wanting me out but not saying it outright. They want me to fix the coffee machines from being hacked so I need to go in and adjust the firmware updates. But by putting me in this secluded rock section behind a waterfall, I can get the hint. If you want to fire me, just do it! I know what I'll do...with access to those coffee machines, let's see how you like it when that new firmware update makes them only pump out decaf. ] Development Mindfulness Checklist: After breaking through the Z-shielded wall after the second AR room, you'll be back inside the building. It's on the left side of the room on one of the tables. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! A message from the HR department: "SPONSORED BY MIMOSA'S SPARKLING WATER" Remember when you are overworked or stressed to practice Vandelay Mindfulness: a helpful technique in overcoming unneeded thoughts. Step 1: Go into rest mode and channel your inner thought chip. Step 2: Identify your emotions and acknowledge how you feel about this problem. Step 3: If your feeling is negative to anyone besides yourself, remind yourself that this is "negative thinking." Have you considered the fact that YOU are the source of the problem or there is no problem at all? Step 4: Whatever the problem is, it is most definitely not your superior's fault. Realize the problem lies within yourself. Once you go through this process, you will have achieved Vandelay Mindfulness! Track 5: Breaking Out Defect Captured Email: At the very beginning of the track, turn and head back into the room Chai and 808 just left. The vlog is on the machine to the right. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Email sent from Korsica@vandelaysecurity to Vandelay-all@vandelaytechnologies "We got him" I know there have been reports about a Project Armstrong defect running around the campus, but thanks to the diligent work of security, we've managed to safely secure the individual. A special shoutout to those in production and development for their efforts and...sacrifice...in securing the individual. The "defect" is contained in security, guarded by the best of our ranks. I don't see any possible way that this can go awry. -Korsica Annoyed By Korsica FWD: In the main security area, before you walk towards the elevator, go right, in-between the machines near the entrance. The vlog is on one of these machines. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Get a load of this: talk about try-hard ///// Email forwarded from Korsica@VandelaySecurity Reminder to all employees about maintaining top security clearance. Did you know how easy it is to accidently assume non-employees as one of our own? To make sure, follow these steps: 1) Always ask for identification. We have ID badges for a reason. Don't just assume that someone was sent down from another department. 2) Prevent people walking in doors behind you. If necessary, push them to the ground and run away to make sure they don't follow you in. 3) Casually ask them questions that may reveal that they are not employees of the company. An example would be: "Don't you enjoy working for (INSERT RIVAY COMPNAY HERE) in order to infiltrate Vandelay and steal secrets?" With these helpful hints, we can keep our workplace safe. Musings About Date Node: In the area around the elevator, there are some catwalks you can climb up to. On one of these catwalks, you'll find the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////Personal NOTE: TEC-78 #3168 [ Sometimes I like to look at all these data nodes and think. Man...that's a lot of data. I mean, it jsut keeps going! And data is, like, really small, so there must be a lot of data in all those nodes. Who is even looking at it? No one knows...maybe there's someone out there who, like, really digs data. Or maybe someone just likes collecting it. Yeah, that must be it. Data could be anything or nothing at all. Yeah. ] Poem by SCR-UB: In the room before the Security Node 2 room, go up onto the balcony to the right, then through the door there. It's on a crate between some machinery in that room. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////Personal Note: SCR-UB #51666 [ I HAVE COMPOSED A POEM ABOUT CLEANING: I CLEAN THE FLOORS. BUT ROBOTS ARE CLEAN BEINGS. THERE MAY BE NOTHING MUCH TO CLEAN, BUT I CLEAN NONETHELESS. ----MAY THOSE WHO FIND THESE WORDS OF WISDOM BE AT PEACE ] Vandelay Game Studios?: Can only be found after beating the game. After breaking through the Z-shielded wall that leads to the way up to Security Node 1, go to the left, through the fire gate. Walk forward, then up the stairs, to where the large red slide is. It's on a desk right in front of you. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////INTEROFFICE LOG FROM TEC-78 #11545 to TEC-78 #0083 [ I looked it up and you were right! Vandelay used to have a videogame development studio in-house! I heard it was really rough, though. The person in charge of the project was a real pain, so they would get back at them by hiding messages IN THE GAME. Rumor is they closed it up, sealed it off, and it's somewhere deep underground. Wonder if it'll pop up one of these days with all this construction going on? ] Regarding Wing 1 Layout Complaints: To the left of the entrance to the room that node 1 is in, there's a raised platform with a bunch of servers and machines on it. The vlog is on one of those machines. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! From Korsica@VandelaySecurity RE: Security layout considerations. I heard you loud and clear. The layout of the security department wing 1 leaves...a bit to be desired. But at this point, redoing the layout and keeping all our facilities intact and working will only increase inefficiency. Of course, scrapping and building a new wing with a new layout is considered for wing 3, if we decide to make it, but for now we'll have to do what we can with wing 1. -Korsica FWD: Data Node Advice: Up the ramp that leads towards Security Node 3, there's a bunch of servers and machines. It's on one of those machines. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! From Korsica@vandelaysecurity -just passing this along. Some good info here! //////FWD:FWD:FWD:FWD Message Data nodes and you: An easy guide to know whether or not you should be handling a data node. Do you know what a user data node is? -Good! That means you should be handling one. Do you know the horrible consequences of being trapped inside a data node? -If not, then you are approved to work on data nodes! Do you tend to hit things when they don't work correctly? -If so, you are NOT approved to work on data nodes. Korsica Complaints: Before you ride the lift back down to the main area after the fight that follows reconnecting the third node, go to the left and jump onto one of the moving platforms. It'll take you to a nearby area, where you can climb up to a higher platform. It's up there. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////INTEROFFICE LOG FROM TEC-78 #41477 to TEC-78 #82217 [ I can't take it with these daily security emails from Korsica. I get it, security is important, change your password, yeah yeah yeah yeah. But come on, I think she's just trying to make it look like it's MY fault if I decide to leave my workstation and have sensitive files just open for anyone to see. Way to pass the blame... ] Track 6: L.I.F.T. Me Up LIFT Construction Heads-Up: As you make your way down the ramps, towards the L.I.F.T, you'll find it on a bench next to a trash can and one of the large screens that advertisements and anyone talking over the intercoms can be seen on. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////INTEROFFICE LOG FROM VA-SER #31446 to TEC-78 #212221 [ I know you keep bugging us about the construction of the L.I.F.T. tunnels, but apparently marketing wants advertisements along the route. This is an employee only transport and all we can spend our credits on are drinks and Zanzo merch, so I don't know why we need interoffice marketing, but...whatever. Mimosa says she wants the signs to hang low though, she said she wants to hit you over the head with the product. Workers aren't sure whether it was literal or not, so they are playing it safe with...literal. Might want to spread word. I'd keep my head down if I were you. ] Track 7: The Climb Platform Construction Note: After the first fight, walk forward. It's on a pallet next to a forklift with two boxes on it and some other construction equipment. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////NOTE FROM VA-SER TO CONSTRUCTION CREW [ Lot of questions about the construction and what it's for so I'll just say it: we got a budget and if we don't use it, we lose it. Sooooo, wing 2 platform construction is officially to change a lightbulb above the L.I.F.T. platform. I heard there's a crack in a wall leading into wing 2, but we'll just paint over that for now. Save it for next quarter. ] Too Many Rooms: After the second 2D section, go around the glass wall that the TEC-78 is lying next to. Follow the path around, and you'll find it on the floor. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////OPEN NOTEPAD FILE [ They wanted me to make a panopticon surveillance room in here, but that is just A: way too creepy, and B: too much work. We're getting complaints the trip up is long enough already, and don't we do enough surveillance around here anyway? So I am just gonna cut this room from the schedule. Doubt anyone will notice. ] Suspicious Doors?: In the big room full of tall cylinders, go up the stairs, towards the shop. Then, go to the right and up the stairs there. At the top, you'll find the vlog on top of a crate next to the suspicious door in question. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////INTEROFFICE COMMUNICATION #7177920 [ Anyone else see these suspicious doors around campus? I even sent an email to one of the PGR units in R&D and they were even less helpful than usual! Normally I would say I have a bad feeling about these doors, but thinking about it...as long as I'm not going in, I don't really care. ] Data Node Dissatisfaction Email: After the first fight in the laser death room, break through the Z-shielded wall. In the upper right corner of the room, you'll find the vlog on top of a crate. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! From korsica@vandelaysecurity NOTICE ON DEFECTIVE DATA NODES: We've noticed an uptick in defective data nodes. These are easily disrupted and, honestly, their gravity defying physics leads me to believe they are mostly style over substance. Therefore, I am asking R&D to develop a simpler and easier to adjust design. Sure, it will make security visually less interesting, but at this point I'll take efficiency over anything. -Korsica Pmidge Press Announcement: Can only be found after beating the game. After the first fight in the laser death room, break through the Z-shielded wall. Then, climb up to the balcony on the right and go through the fire gate. Go down the short corridor into the next room, and over towards Pmidge. To the left, behind some boxes, is the vlog. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! [WARNING: THIS EMAIL IS WRITTEN INAN OLD, UNSUPPORTED FONT] VANDELAY TECHNOLOGIES ANNOUNCES LIMITED EDITION SMARTFRIDGE Today, Vandelay Technologies has proudly touted a limited version of its smart fridge line, which they have dubbed the Pmidge. Due to its artistic AI tendnecies, this limited edition model (with a tastefully retro coloring) will give you recommendations from an artistic value perspective rather than just a healthy perspective. So, instead of just suggesting food with nutritional value, this new model will offer suggestions based off of a visual wellness guide. Depressed Buttons: After the lasers stop moving, go into the only room you have access to and break the Z-shielded wall inside. It's to the right, on one of the machines. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////NOTICE TO TEC-78 UNITS: Please be aware that floor buttons have a habit of getting stuck in their depressed condition and are unable to get out of their "depressed state." This cannot be forcefully fixed. Sufficient time left alone and proper emotional support is required to retrive the button out of this state. It is recommended to not condone these depressed buttons and instead offer understanding as they return to their undepressed state. Food Delivery Warning: Before you head up into the vents to get to the boss fight, walk up to the boxes in front of the door to Korsica's office. It's on one of the boxes. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////FOOD DELIVERY MESSAGE: This message is left for //Korsica//: Your order for lunch has unfortunately been sent back, due to us being unable to contact you and you being unable to attend to our delivery person sent to your door. If you request another delivery, please order again, but know that your interoffice staff order ranking has been negatively affected by your unresponsiveness. Track 8: A History Lesson Project Armstrong Raffle Results: In the upper part of the opening area, before you go through the fire gate, go to the blue tent on the upper left side. There's a trash can to the left of it that the vlog is in. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Notice on Project Amrstrong Festival Faffle Results Thank you [Valued Employee Name Here] for applying for the interoffice raffle. You were NOT selected to be able to attend! Thank you for your interest int he Project Armstrong festival. Here is a coupon for your discount on your "I was not selected for hte Armstrong festival raffle" t-shirt. //// This is an automatic message and cannot be replied to with discontent. Armstrong Festival Marketing?: At the very beginning, drop down from the ticket booth you're on. The vlog is on the counter. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////OPEN NOTEPAD DOCUMENT: [ I heard htat marketing couldn't even come up with a tagline for the event, so they are just seeing what trends and then just claiming they made that one up afterwards. How come marketing can get away with that? Every other section is busting their butts getting stuff done! ] Charging: After getting through the fire gate, walking down the hall, and then dropping down to the area below, you'll find a sleeping VA-SER. It's next to them. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Not dead. Just charging. Leave me be, and DON'T touch the charging points. THey are very sensitive. Taking a Break in the Park: Before you go over the broken fence with yellow caution tape, turn around. It's on a stack of metal pipes. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////OPEN NOTEPAD FILE FROM CAR-11E #419001 [ I love coming here and playing with the KUT-WAN dogs! You'd think they'd be scary since they are made to chop up grass, but they like to cuddle, too! ANd this spot is also a great place to take a break without anyone seeing you! My job is safe! ] GNR-020 Display: When you enter the museum, first display on the left. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Introducing our first line of life assistance: the GNR-020! Their beam arm displays over 7 billion lumens for lighting up even the darkest areas. Trying to find that old box of clothes in the dark basement? Or are you trying to relax by reading a book before going to bed? The GNR model is there to light the way! BES-102 Display: When you enter the museum, second display on the left. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Our BES-102 model: a premier luxury brand protectiong service. These days, the world is filled with risk: falling meteors, out of control kites, the list goes on. But the BES model will make sure safeity is its top priority. With 360-degree spherical barrier protection, this personal assistant can make absolutely sure it is protected form every angle. User's protection is not guaranteed. BL-1Z5 Display:* When you enter the museum, third display on the left. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Vandelay is proud to introduce a new addition to our outdoor line, the BL-1Z5 unit! For the explorer who doesn't want to lug around cooking supplies, the BL-1Z5 can handle everything for you; it can roast, singe, and make sure your meal is best in class no matter where you are! No need to worry about tough food! A few punches from its tried and tested "tender punch" will make sure your dish is chewable and fresh. SBR-001 Display: When you enter the museum, first display on the right. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Our premiere line of basic lifestyle assistance: the SBR-001. Vandelay is committed to non-violent and helpful services, and the SBR-001 sets the standard! A respectful and genuine personal assistant can help with those tiny problems in your life, whether it's fixing mechanical problems around the house or just making sure the bed is made after you wake up. ES-101 Display: When you enter the museum, second display on the right. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Show your elite-ness with the ES-101! Want to show your associates that you want a SBR-001 nit, but have enough money to go one step further? Then the ES-101 model fits the bill. It's everything the standard SBR model can do, just bigger and more luxurious. Say everything without saying anything at all by upgrading to the ES series! BA-B00 Display: When you enter the museum, third display on the right. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Our high-premiere robotic emotional support series BA-B00! Years in the making, Vandelay has finally released its robotic companion, taking every aspect of all species of pet and combining them into one robotic emoetional comfort support that will stay close to you through your hardest times. Its speech is replaced by an AI-determined set of grunts and growls that naturally comfort and ease stress! Reminder to Reception: On the right side of the museum's front desk. It's on the computer facing you. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Don't forget! ANd if anyone complains about the announcements, flag their IDs for me. -MIMOSA ////// REMINDER TO RECEPTION: 1) Access to Vandelay museum is always free but it does require a mandatory donation. 2) To anyone entering, make sure to make them aware of the "Vandelay Arrow." We didn't patent that thing for nothing. 3) If anyone brings up the fact that they are disappointed in the exhibit, respond with the question, "What exhibit?" and then repeatedly try to convince them that they are in a dream. BRUT-1L Display: Up the stairs, it's display to the left. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Emrbace your inner caretaker, externally with the BRUT-1L. Taking care of all those chores is just a chore in itself! Not anymore with the BRUT-1L series! Be it a hedge, your messy hair, slicing bread, or just a piece of your mind, its radial cutting technology takes the edges off everything! Our Community Helper: BA-B00: Up the stairs, it's the display to the right. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Our latest version of the BA-B00 model may be cute and cuddly, but it's always safety first when it comes to these units! Dispatched to cities and areas to help even the smallest of us stay out of harms way! The BA-B00 is the emotional support we need in and out of the house. SEN-C0 Display: The display is in the upper right corner of the room after the room that goes over the founding of the company. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! INTRODUCING THE SEN-C0 LINE OF PERSONAL ASSISTANCE For that trusty companion that follows you everywhere and laughs at your jokes, the SEN-C0 line will carry your goods, protect you from bad weather, and absolutely not go insane.* Rest those arms and shade those worries! Insanity reduction is coming in future update. Disappointed O5-KAR:* Through the vent, into the back area of the museum, climb up to the pipes overhead to get to the other side of the large fence. Then, drop down next to the shelves there. It's on one of them. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////OPEN NOTEPAD FILE FROM O5-KAR #179 [ I noticed they are chucking a lot of garbage in the back here to either fix or get rid of. Vandelay museum should be a shining success story, talking about our great Roxanne and what she built, but I get the feeling marketing is putting their budget elsewhere. Going from our robotic retellings of history to these cardboard cutouts? What a shame. ] Water Generator Complaint: Next to the second generator that turns off the power. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! AUTOMATIC REPLY FROM MARKETING: YOUR REQUEST: Replace complex water generators and jumping puzzles with simple electric switch. REQUEST DENIED REASON: This is so much cooler. Display Complaints: In the upper area of the museum, where you can jump onto the platforms holding up the hanging displays, you can find it on a crate to the right before you jump onto said platforms. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////NOTE FROM MARKETING OK SOMEONE MESSED UP BIG TIME! Some model from a scrapped version of the KEM-0N0 series is hanging in the open air section. We scrapped that for a reason! Looks like SOMEONE didn't get the message and put it on display. I thought we destroyed all the leftover models! But whatever...just...take that thing down! Last thing we need is people speculating about what's in the pipeline. -MIMOSA KEM-0N0 Display: After the room that goes over how Roxanne retired and Kale took over, the display case is on the left in the next room. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! The KEM-0N0 line, a fierce and firnedly child protector and playable companion. Our KEM-0N0 shows the softer side of Vandelay. Want a pet without all of the waste and frustrating caretaking? Equipped with cuddle mode, this unit is sure to charm even the youngest of future Vandelay fans. SBR Development Display: After the room that goes over how Roxanne retired and Kale took over, the display case is next to a giant screen in the next room. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! While at Vandelay we make it look easy, developing things sure does take quite an effort. Look at how our SBR line of helpful handymen has been improved since our first version! Tougher, sharper, and hopefully more positively received by test audiences! Door Musings From SCR-UB: After another generator platforming challenge, before you break the Z-shielded wall, turn around and platform up the pipes, then jump over to the other platform. The vlog will be on the machine down the walkway. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////NOTEPAD FILE FROM SCR-UB #615616 [ I SEE THIS STRANGE DOOR. I QUESTION THE PURPOSE. BUT WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD? THE LONGER I STARE AT THIS DOOR, IT STARES BACK AT ME. ] Track 9: Take the Stage Armstrong Festival Briefing Notes: After dropping down from the gated area you have to climb over, on top of an instrument case to the right. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Cut the second paragraph. No negativity at all. Feels like an apology. Makes us look weak. -Mimosa ---- ////PRE-RELEASE CONFIRMATION ON POST-PROJECT ARMSTRONG FESTIVAL ANNOUNCEMENT//// Vandelay Technologies is proud to announce that the Project Armstrong festival occurrred with astounding success on the Vandelay campus, with special critical acclaim to the headlining performance from Mimosa. The only possible negative comments were by some who were unable to get tickets to the performance due to astronomical demand. Mimosa has been quoted leaving the stage after he show as saying, "Never have I seen anything as glorifying to myself as this festival. I think we found our new annual tradition." Mimosa's Rider: At the end of the corridor on a bench near the shop. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Mimosa's Hospitality Rider: -100 unopened bottles of water stacked in a pyramid shape. -A private jet fueled and ready to fly, but not intended for use at nearby airfield. -Two LU-C1LLE units standing as coat racks. Note: Due to weather, no coats will be needed, but coat racks still required. -Three 5-meter aquariums with 47 species of fish on route from dressing room to stage to "set the mood." -17 packages of colored candy pakcets with all the green colors removed. -Cream filled cookies separated with equal 50/50 ratio of cream on both sides of the cookies. -One SCR-UB unit to personally move 3 steps ahead of Mimosa to ensure pathway is clean and sanitized for her. NO EXCEPTIONS WILL BE MADE Track 10: A Master Plan Cafeteria Menu: After the big fight in the cafeteria, before you go through the hole in the wall, head over to the tables and chairs by the windows. It's on the table in the upper corner. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! This week's menu from the Vandelay cafeteria: Monday 1 - Tiny sandwiches. Filling larger than bread Monday 2 - Large sandwiches. Bread larger than filling Monday 3 - Single carrot on plate dribbled with carrot sauce Monday 4 - Ultimate deep dish pizza Tuesday - Chef regular: nutrition goo Wednesday - Un-sauced burger Thursday - Cupcake Thursday (in salad form) Friday - Chef special Vandelay Grammar Check: In the room where Roquefort's hologram appears, go to the upper left door. It's on the steps in front of it. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! UNSENT EMAIL: Hey, I was just circling back to see if per my last email- Vandelay grammar check has automatically deleted email. Reason: weak opening. Atrium State Mail: When you first enter the atrium, go to the left. It's on a table near some benches. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! To: vandelay-all@vandelay From: KaleV@vandelay RE Kale Statue: I want to thank all those involved with construction of the oversized version of my likeness. I don't think that this feat can be overstated. While this can be seen as self-centered and egomaniacal, I disagree. It is a standing monument to what one person can achieve. Personally, I feel it's subtle, if anything. As a self-made man (disregarding my family lineage, inherited welath, and the fact that I started at the top and worked my way sideways to get this position), I hope this piece is a reminder that you, yes, YOU, can one day be the head of the world's largest corporation. -K Budge Challenge Email: After you ride on the rail and shoot the button to summon the platforms, go inside the office. Near the exit, it's on a coffee table between two black couches. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! From: roquefort@vandelay RE: Budget Challenge I'd like to thank every section of the company for participating in the budget challenge. While it was difficult to shave off unnecessary costs, the results have allowed us to have our most profitable quarter yet and increased bonuses for all our top employees. I'd personally like to give the finance section a special thanks for submitting the idea of removing the left arms and legs from development programmers to cut costs. A brilliant move! -RF Hoodie Preorder Email: In the office you have to break a Z-shielded wall to get into, go to the computer that's directly across from you. It's on there. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! COMMEMORATIVE HOODIE PRE-ORDERS FOR EMPLOYEES Due to the amount of commotion regarding the escaped defect, and Kale's assurance that the situation will be handled with finality, we've begun accepting preorders for the humorously themed, "I survived the Project Armstrong defect fiasco," hoodies. These will be available in a white nimbus colorway with the text in a font called Tangolian Rail. They will be individually numbered for any surviving employees. Please register your size in the link below: SECURITY NOTE: UNAUTHORIZED LINK AUTOMATICALLY REMOVED Vandelay Handbook Note: On the roof of the same office as the last vlog, jump over/go around the divider to reach the vlog, which is on one of the benches there. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Vandelay employee handbook: Here you will find the simple steps to becoming the most powerful company in the world: 1) Do everything better than anyone else and make more money.* Thank you for reading this employee handbook. All 150,788 sub-conditions to this step are included in mandatory online tutorials. All employees will have one week to complete the courses. Roquefort Meeting Prep:* Before you go into Roquefort's office, go to the left. It's on the edge of a planter, near a door. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////OPEN NOTE [ HR says I should keep the ball and write down my tasks and achievements to stay motivated. Well, this new budget may be a bit of an increase, but I see it as a good move in the public's eye. I can't imagine Roquefort disagreeing with me. He seems like a very reasonable man. I feel as confident as ever! ] SPECTRA Hub Room All of these can only be found after beating all 8 of the SPECTRA doors in the tracks. My Super Secret Plan: When you first enter, it's on the first machine to the left. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Note file: My super secret plan They say a good idea should always be simple and clear, so I will write it down here where surely no one will read it or use it against me: Step 1: Create hypebeast limited availability for Project Armstrong -Open reseller site to profit off voucher resell for bonus profit Step 2: Spectra integration -Use SPECTRA to sub-consciously push Armstrong users on non-users to encourage participation. -Likely Spectra push is optional since robot limts are totally hot right now. Step 3: SPECTRA indoctrintation -Use Spectra to push users to other Vandelay projects. -Subsequent inconsequential upgrades in models will seem like ideal purchases to these users. Step 4: Get rid of annoying staff at Vandelay -Who needs all these employees with minimum effort into our next projects? Step 5: Watch those profits roll in, baby. Oh yeah. -Kale Preorder Bonuses?: Up the stairs to the left, on the machine on the left side of the platform. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! From: Roquefort@Vandelayfinance To: Kale Just circling back ont he "super secret plan" that you've been constnatly emailing me about. Love it. I'm all in. But, well, I've been wondering if we could squeeze a bit more out of it with some sort of preorder bonus? Or any upsell options post enrollment? Get in one that hype and cash in with some low-quality goods as well. Zanzo's got all those dolls, I'm sure we could throw one of those in as a promo. Anyway, if we're going all in, might as well go for the squeeze. -RF Potential Project Musings: When you first enter, it's on the last machine to the right. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////Kale Note FILE: Potential projects Some sort of underground living environment. Sell ont he idea of unsure future. Lock people in for hundreds of years or so. Actually meant for social experiments, sell consumer info to marketing company? Wait this is dumb. Who wants this info? Hundreds of years for any potential profit. Doesn't even make sense in a doomsday scenario. No one would buy this. Leaving this here as a reminder to get more sleep. Shot in the Eye: In the center of the room, on the machine towards the upper left. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! Zanzo, Stop. Just stop. Even you jumped the shark on this one. IN THE EYE? What the shit? THere's gotta be a better way. like, literally ANYTHING besides that. Ugh. Sometimes I wonder why I even hired you. Original Message below//////// From Zanzoooooo@Vandelay To: Kale Subject: Got an Idea So, I was thinking, not that that we found anything YET, but what IF we found alien DNA and could implant that in a person by injecting them in the eye, giving us natural superpowers! No more robotics, just cool alien superpowers! I'm shifting half the team on this one already. Say no more! Out of My Mind: On the upper right side of the lower area, on the machine near the walkway up to the final door. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////Kale Note FILE: Self Reflection As much as I know I'm perfect, even every idea I come up with takes time to turn into the masterpeice that it is. Take SPECTRA. While a wireless AI that could alter subconsciousness seems like a no-brainer (HA!), it didn't come to fruiting right away. I first thought of it as an idea of putting a serial killer's brain in a machine that would send out a signal pulling everyone into a dream world created by the mind of a psychopath. Obviously, on paper, this is failproof, but then I thought: wait, why does it need to be the mind of a serial killer? Also, what does that GAIN me in the real world? All in all, it was clearly a terrible idea and all signs pointed to it going wrong, but hey, at least I stopped before I went in THAT direction! Never Ask For Ideas: Up the stairs to the right, on the machine between the doors. Click here to read the contents of this vlog! ////Kale Note FILE: Staff ideas I usually just burn the box of staff notes because they are all terrible, but for laughs, I read through it and had nice mirthquake. Someone, or thing, had the idea for a technology for an infinitely repeating day, some sort of loop. It resets in the evening, allowing for "free for all" without restrictions because everything gets reset in the end. I have to say, quite out there; hard to market. But worst of all, if everything resets, how are we going to make any money? It all goes away at the end! Even worse, what if some asshole wants out, starts rebelling? It's a day of chaos! An obvious note to self: never take ideas from anyone but yourself. They are all terrible. Click here to see all of the vlogs that can only be found in that post-game area I mentioned earlier! In-Universe Welcome to Vandelay Gameworks! If you are reading this, you are probably a new worker ready to join our very professional game studio, Vandelay Gameworks. With our new self-care policy, we ask you to apply yourself at work with everything you have, while following these two protocols: 1) Self-analyze. Write a message to yourself. Sometimes it's the only way we see our true selves and really get to know just exactly what it takes to make a video game. As we all know, it can be a fun challenge to spend years of your life on something that may casually be overlooked by poor release timing/marketing issues/just making a terrible product. We must always ask ourselves: what is our suffering, and is it all worth it? 2) Write a message to the players. In the extremely rare case that your game gets released, imagine that you can communicate directly to the players. What would you like to tell them? This is what we call "output!" These simple steps can guide us to a healthy and all-encompassing work environment. Whatever that means. -Vandelay HR Department Infinity Guitars Well...the director asked for more guitars on the soundtrack, so I bought more guitars. But why would I need multiple guitars when I can just use one? Ehhh, I shouldn't worry, it's just another expense. Write it off, baby! But, man, there's a lot of music. I waited my whole life to write that first song, and now I need to do 40 with such a tight turnaround. At this point I'm just winging it lyrically. I wrote this last song about a sandwich. It was a really good sandwich, though. Perhaps this whole soundtrack can be a concept album. About that sandwich...every bite is a new song; a taste; a new sonic world to be transported to. Just gotta adjust this guitar wall and make sure they don't come falling down on me. Otherwise, I'm golden for awards season! Global Readiness We are supposed to translate this into 35 different languages and...I think I need more monitors here. Worst of all, they want to cut costs, so they are making me translate! I don't even know these languages! Not to mention that these are full of spelling mistakes! I'm here trying to make sure the world can appreciate all of this content, and you can't even take the time to spellcheck your documents before sending them to me? Who do you think needs to fix all of them when we bug check— Oh no. Is that a spelling mistake IN THE ANIMATED SCENE?! We can't fix this! And I'm sure I'll get blamed for it! Affect Effect I can't make an effect unless I can FEEL it, you know? I take my inspiration from somewhere inside, somewhere much more visceral than all these code crunchers around me know how to deal with. If I have to, I'll hit myself with these things until I know it's right. You want giant words? I'll give you big words. Boom, Bam, Smack. You like that? But here's the thing: why am I the only one who takes their job seriously? I see the rest of them here, doing la-di-da on their computers or whatevers, but I don't see the grit. I need to be surrounded by my work, even if I can't escape from it. All I gotta say, though, is that at least I'm making something colorful here. If this was a horror game, I'd feel pretty bad for the cleaning crew. Holding It All Together I set everything up, balanced it perfectly, and then, BAM! One of the game designers just tweaked the damage numbers and now everything is falling apart. Does the design team even know what they're doing?! Buncha amateurs! Our team is working hard just trying to keep things stable, and everyone here is just uploading things, messing around with parameters, and now nothing works. And even worse, I'm getting yelled at ! Just so you know..."director"...sure, you think you have all these cool ideas, but we bring it to life! Gonna put my foot down next time he comes around! Oh, wait, he's sweating, probably not a good time. But tomorrow! I'll show him who's boss. For sure! Life of Its Own I want things to be functional, but the director keeps asking for things that are a bit too...abstract? The order was that the UI feels "alive," so I thought giving the UI its own AI and allowing it to make decisions for itself was a smart move. Now it keeps changing the options on the fly. THe game language changes every minute or so and the descriptions for options are getting downright offensive tothe players. And for some reason...starting a new game orders a pizza. I should really be figuring this out since we've got orders to make a photo mode and all these extra features, but hey...free pizza! Down to the T So many animators focus on getting the animations right, but I realized that no one has really nailed the ultimate T-pose for animation. Getting that T-pose to feel right means commitment. You've got to hold it as long as possible, capture it from every angle, and make sure the posture is absolutely perfect. That's why I'm gonna do it. I'll capture it myself. How can we make a good animation if we don't have a good T-pose as a jump-off point? But I need a solid loop; a good year of motion-captured data should help me out. All those sways, the tenseness leading to my body shaking...you can FEEL that. Only then can I create a character with real emotion. Quiet on Set Every frame is a picture, and here we animate on twos, so that means we have two similar pictures for every frame? Or one picture for every two frames? Whatever, I don't do the math, I just make the cutscenes. But just hush for a moment... You hear that? That beat? no, it's not the metronome to keep the cutscenes in time...it's my heartrate (or as I call it, my circuit blips). I finally hit my stride! THis is my best work yet and my blips are entering the danger zone! If only that goofy director would just stop coming over and asking for these (terrible) changes. You can't beat perfect! So, swallow up that pride and leave this cool chair and megaphone to me, because I call the shots in this zone! Office Space I wash and I dry. I'm here every night making these numbers work and look at these...children. All they do is try to make "fun." I deal in logic, not fantasy. The games are getting to expensive to make. Back when I was doing it, we were a clutch group knocking out hits in our sleep. These days...it's years before they're even playable! But I watch over these chumps like a hawk. Every step they take, every keystroke. I can see every choice they make with a cost on it. There are corners to be cut here, for sure. One of those "game designers," they're barely doing anything. I bet I could make them disappear and no one will even know. I'll write it off, a loss on a spreadsheet. Outta the red and into the black! Internal Perfection Have you ever looked at the inside of a video game model? A lot of games don't even bother with that stuff. No one can see it, so why even spend the energy putting a texture on it? But by our director's decree...we need our characters to be ALIVE. That's why everything we make is handcrafted down to the inside. The inner lining of the stomach, every blood vessel, and even a working circulatory system. You may not see it, but we know it's there, and that's why we are the best in the biz. But now they have us making robots, so I made sure that every robot enemy has each individual wire and circuit board grafted to mechanical perfection. So what if the programmers say it slows the game down to a crawl? So what if the animators need to individually put motion to every red blood cell or electric current? At least no one will think the modeling team is slacking off. Scale Up We had our first focus test, and the users just said they wanted to climb everything; go everywhere. This isn't some open-world game; you can't just see a mountain in the distance and be able to climb it. There aren't thousands of planets you can fly to and experience the universe! Do they even know what game we are making? But now the bigwigs are demanding we change everything. So, while I was supposed to make these nice compact levels, everything's scaled up with the same staff! We're a small team, we can't do that... I'm looking at the director over there and he's just sweating, which means he's totally in control. He sweats when he's calm. So maybe it isn't such a big deal to parabolically increase our workload and not change the schedule. Fruit Service As part of the benefits for working for Vandelay Gameworks, we have provided free and fresh fruit for display and consumption. Note: Due to limited benefit budget, this fruit will not be restocked. To preserve the image of worker benefits, we advise that you do NOT consume said fruit. Art Direction I thought I was an artist. But then I get these words for the art direction for the project: clandestine, coda, salutations. I...have...no idea what any of those have to do with art, and when I brought it up, I was told, "a real artist would show me what I mean." I've gotten myself in deeper than I thought. Weren't we supposed to make a lighthearted romp of an action game? Does this director even know what he's doing? Or maybe I don't know what I'm doing. But I have a deadline...I need to get it done. This is a puzzle that I must solve, and if I do...it will be my greatest work yet... ...I think? Producing Product Is this a nursery school or a game studio??? I'm almost literally taking everyone's hand and telling them what to do, and I'm at my wit's end here! Management's telling me that I've gotta manage every team on a molecular level, and to be hoenst, that is going to be one hell of a spreadsheet. You know what would be nice? Hear me out: if people just TALKED to each other, we'd probably be free of most of these problems! Think of everything int he world that could be solved by just...talking! And now... Wait, where's the director? Is he hiding in the back? Ugh, my arrows weren't enough to get his attention... Fine, I'll go talkt o him and try to cheer him up. Just hope he's not sweating again. I Think of Ideas You know what's awesome? Just thinking of cool ideas. And to think I get to do that for work! Actually making the stuff? Ehh, I'll leave it up to the other teams. Just nod at what the director says and tell it to everyone else as an order. Maybe I'll tweak a number here and there, brush off any criticism as "we're still working on it," but otherwise, it's laid-back city over here. Maybe I'll make a slideshow today. Throw a couple funny photos in there; everyone eats that up. Gotta work on my font game, though. THat's key to making it look like you know what you're doing! And if there's anyone who's good at making it LOOK like they know what they are doing, it's us! By Design I've figured out a bug, but it keeps getting flagged as "by design." This is getting annoying... I've found that after triple jumping and doing a dash, which is followed by an immediate heavy attack, then again dashing 2 frames before landing on the ground...the character does a single frame of the falling animation instead of a landing animation. I've been able to reproduce this thing at least twice out of 300 times, and so this is COMPLETELY unacceptable. They really think users won't discover and abuse this? I'm trying to save this project and they keep blowing me off. But let's see who's the butt of the joke when this one explodes on social media and destroys our reputation. Oh, I also found out that they are storing all future content information in plain text that is easily datamined, but hey, every game does that these days anyway. Under Pressure Ok, ok, deep breaths, just play it cool. Everything will work out in the end. Your team likes you, yes they do! Just say it out loud... Directing a video game...it's like steering a ship that's sinking! And then there are these big rocks. You gotta watch out for those. And the ship engine...well, maybe this ship analogy has gone too far. But I've got to go back out and face everyone. Can't hide here forever. Good thing is, at least I'm not sweating. Can't let anyone see me sweat, otherwise my cool director persona is busted. Ok, ok...shake it off. Here we go... You know what? Maybe five more minutes, and then I'll go back. Yeah, that's better. Out of Universe From the Sound Team ----Sound/001/Thanks---- Thank you! Thank you! Thank you for playing Hi-Fi RUSH yeaaaaaaaaaaaah! If you are reading this, that means you really must love this game, I hope. This whole project was made with great teamwork under the strong passionate vision of the director. Being in charge of the sound design, I'm so happy to be able to rock your heart out with this project. Tgank you for all your support! THANK YOU!!!! ----Sound/002/Thanks---- I think that only when players get their hands on and can play the game, can the project officially be "done." So, with that, for all of you who enjoyed this game, it means so much to us creators. For all of you who caught on to the small details with 808's sound design, thank you! She's pretty cute, isn't she? Maybe I should be a bit more serious in this message, but ehhh, it's probably alright, haha. ----Sound/003/Thanks---- If you are reading this message, it means you're still playing Hi-Fi RUSH months after it came out, right? Some of you may be coming back to the game, and if so, that makes me so happy. Thank you to all the players who enjoyed the game! Let's all wonder together just how good Chai will actually get at playing guitar. ----Sound/004/Thanks---- LogSoundProgram: Information: Thank you for playing! You're all shining stars! ----Sound/005/Thanks---- Chai: Oh man! You made it all the way here? You must be a real "rockstar"! Peppermint: You went through a lot to get here! Must have been a tough job! Macaron: Watching you play...was just beautiful! CNMN: You far surpassed my calculations. That was quite enjoyable and unexpected from someone of your skill level. Korsica: Not bad, I must say. I see some potential in you. Roxanne: Your performance was impressive, and it has resonated within me. I thank you. From the person in charge of the Japanese voiceover, that's my attempt at getting my thanks across "in-game." ----Sound/006/Thanks---- It's all about 808. She's so cute. But I gotta say, I'm more about Korsica, if you know what I mean. For all the love you've sent, thank you so much! ----Sound/007/Thanks---- Thank you for playing!! Best vibrations to you! From the Localization Team ----Localization/001/Thanks---- If you are reading this, it means you read all the tutorials, cringed while talking to numerous Smidges, and laughed (don't be embarrassed, you must have at least smiled!) at all the puns! Congrats, you made it! Many thanks for playing Hi-Fi RUSH, hope you enjoyed it. You might have thought, "Hey, there's more text than I thought." You know what? ME TOO! To implement 13 languages, 8 voice-overs for the "more-text-than-initially-estimated," we could have not done it without the dedicated translation teams for each language. Don't tell people you heard it from me, but I think their schedule was similar to what Zanzo would have ordered...? Nah, just kidding! Anyways, please give a round of applause to the talented rockstar translation teams! (And we would be overjoyed if you could leave a nice comment about localization in reviews!) With hopes that Hi-Fi RUSH brought a brighter light into your life! Again, thanks for picking up Hi-Fi RUSH. From the VFX Team ----VFX/001/Thanks---- I used to be a rockstar like you, but then I took an arrow to the knee. ----VFX/002/Thanks---- So tired...so tired...maybe I just need a snack. But now it's cat time! From the Programmers ----Programming/001/Thanks---- We started saying, "It'll be over soon," but that was 5 years ago!" I feel very fortunate that I was able to work on Hi-Fi RUSH from the very beginning to the final moment. I could barely keep rhythm at first, but I like to think I've gotten a bit better by now. That being said, I still don't really understand what a triplet is...to all the players out there, thank you!! ----Programming/002/Thanks---- Thank you for playing this far! Do you have a favorite enemy in the game? My favorite was the SES-103, and I wasn't much of a fan of the VU-REV! ----Programming/003/Thanks---- This was the first game I was ever involved in making! Thank you so much for playing! ----Programming/004/Thanks---- If you are reading this, that means you've rocked your heart out to all types of rhythms! Thank you! Don't think, Feeeeeeel! ----Programming/005/Thanks---- Thank you for playing! The cartoon art style was totally different than The Evil Within series, so it was quite difficult to make, but regardless, I hope you enjoyed the game! ----Programming/006/Thanks---- It was a tough project, but actually having it be the most challenging project of my career was a lot of fun! HOwever, I still see those bug reports in my dreams saying, "XXXXXXXX does not sync with the rhythm." But thank you for playing all the way here! ----Programming/007/Thanks---- Thank you for playing! Do you have a favorite stage in the game? If so, you should let us know. Oh, and you probably noticed, but there was supposed to be one more stage in there... ----Programming/008/Thanks---- First and foremost, thank you to all the players reading this. I was very fortunate to be a member of hte team and be able to see the game to release! ----Programming/09/Thanks---- Hi there! I'm the "robot" in charge of the Korsica battle! There might be some people who enjoyed it more than others, but we tried to make her fight a rhythm game in a classical sense. It seems like people who really like those games are fond of it, so I'm so glad to see the positive reactions. Should it have been harder or easier? You should let us know! From the UI Team ----UI/001/Thanks---- While making the game, on my day off, I somehow managed to fracture my arm. And while it didn't break, having to work while keeping my arm in a fixed position might have broken my spirit just a bit. ----UI/002/Thanks---- I wonder if anyone found the recipe Korsica uses to make coffee and tried it out? ----UI/003/Thanks---- Every day while working on the project, I kept thinking: why are all these characters named after foods? (It always made me hungry) When petting 808, is she warm or cold? Do you think the UI window sizes are big enough? From the Animation Team ----Animation/001/Thanks---- Before joining the project, I was like, "So it's a rhythm game? But then when I joined, I was surprised! Listening to the director, it was full of action! But I basically failed music class growing up. What's a BPM? Is that a food? That was my level of understanding. And now, here we are, and the game managed to be released! Thank you to everyone who played! ----Animation/002/Thanks---- 808, YES! ----Animation/003/Thanks---- I contributed to both projects in the studio, so I feel like I'm two people! FYI I'm more of a Tango-chan person than an 808 person... ----Animation/004/Thanks---- Anyone else would have missed it, but I can catch that single frame of animation! Personally, I've begun playing over actions games with pressing the button to the rhythm! ----Animation/005/Thanks---- I went from being the motion actor for schoolgirls to being a dancing robot reference. That day involved a lot of sweating. Come to think of it, I don't think we washed that capture suit in over a year... For me, during production, I had a daughter! ----Animation/006/Thanks---- The pace might be fast, but hey, you gotta believe! ----Animation/007/Thanks---- Thank you to everyone who played the game! There are a lot of homages to movies in the cutscenes, so I hope you try and find them all! From the Modeling Team ----Modeling/001/Thanks---- If you are reading this message, you spure spent your time playing, I imagine. Or, maybe you are watching someone stream the game? Regardless, as a member of the Hi-Fi RUSH team, i want to say how happy I am to know you enjoyed your experience! At first, when we started making this game, everything was new for us, and that was tough. But after that, everything was a lot of fun. We made as many costumes as we could for you to enjoy, so please try them all and find your favorite when playing. And for those who made it this far, as a way of saying thanks, we made a special costume set as a present for you. (Please check in with the nearby staff for your gift!) Until we meet again... ----Modeling/002/Thanks---- Somehow, Tango-chan has made its way into this world. What journey brought it here? Well, you'll have to look throughout the game to see its story (no reward for finding evrything, though...) But looking at the model viewer, I think Tango-chan has grown a lot. Make sure you get a nice look at it in there! From the Environment Team ----Environment/001/Thanks---- This studio is where Hi-Fi RUSH all began! Doesn't it just give off this fun and comfy energy for a workplace? If you are here, that means...congratulations on completing all the challenges! Be proud of yourself! Tell the internet! ----Environment/002/Thanks---- To our dear ex-environment leader...I hope you are doing well. I sometimes think of you, as I look up at the sky. Don't worry, I'm doing alright. Oh, yeah, and about that time I got mad at the director...and got mad at the art director...not just htat one time, but all those times...you may think I'm one of those dangerous robots out to get you, but I swear I'm not! ...at least I think so. Thank you for playing all the way to this point! And for all of you talking about it on the internet, sharing screenshots, making fan art...all of htat just makes me filled with joy every time I see them! Before bed, I check every site and feed to see if anything new popped up! Making this project was filled with a LOT of trial and error, but we couldn't have done it without the help from our outsourced partners and freelancers to make it all happen. So thank you for everyone involved! It's because of them we were able to bring Hi-Fi RUSH to all of you. Even these added modes! But, most of all, I want to thank any player who made it here. I'm so glad you are still enjoying the game! From the Art Team ----Art/001/Thanks---- Colorful/Clean/Sharp! Colorful/Clean/Sharp! Colorful/Clean/Sharp! Ever since that strange message came to me, it's been looping in my head nonstop. And then, finally, it's been realized int his world we created. I'm just so glad to have made it happen. Finally! Hmm, I've got to return to normal now. But I have this ringing in my ears... ----Art/002/Thanks---- Thank you for playing! Lots of work and love went into this, and I hope it shows. For those that are feeling particularly cultured, take another stroll through the museum and take it all in. Might be exactly the kind of place where the muse strikes. Cheers! From Production ----Production/001/Thanks---- Game development is a hell of a lot of work and stress...but it's also a hell of a lot of fun. I mean, we made a rhythm action game that even a project manager like myself who didn't even know what a quarter note was can enjoy! That's Hi-Fi RUSH. I give huge props to the whole team, and I'm grateful we are receiving so much love from fans. I hope Hi-Fi RUSH and 808 will continue to entertain game fans with its addictive gameplay. ----Production/002/Thanks---- From us, who put our heart and soul into making this game, to you, who put your heart and soul into playing it: thank you! For all the players of Hi-Fi RUSH, I love you all with my heart and soul! ----Production/003/Thanks---- First and foremost, thank you for giving Hi-Fi RUSH a chance. I want to take a moment to express my deepest gratitude for your support and enthusiasm for our game. You have made Hi-Fi RUSH a success beyond our wildest dreams, and we couldn't be more thrilled with the response we've received from players all over the world. We poured our hearts and souls into creating a new game that we hoped would bring joy and excitement to your lives, and nothing is more rewarding than to see players enjoying our game. We feel incredibly fortunate to have such an amazing community of players who are as passionate about Hi-Fi RUSH as we are. So, from the bottom of our hearts, thank you for supporting and being part of the Hi-Fi RUSH excitement. Because without players such as yourselves, the games we create could not exist. Tango Gameworks is dedicated to being a "box of chocolates," in the sense that you never know what you're giong to get. But you can count on us that it'll always be something fun and sweet. We hope you'll continue to join us on this exciting journey. From the Game Design Team WARNING/WARNING/WARNING/ TEXT AMOUNT EXCEEDING READER INTEREST GAME DESIGN REFUSING TO CUT CONTENT WARNING/WARNING/WARNING/ ----GameDesign/001/Thanks---- I've been making games for 20 years and this game had the most first-time experiences ever. Thinking about rhythm when designing enemies, gimmicks, levels, and then remote work on top of that... I was told not to give too much away about design here by the director, so I'll keep it light, but here are some fun dev insights: 1. Early on in those testing days, there sure were a lot of people saying it was hard to understand the gameplay. There might have been a lot of reasons, but maybe the biggest was that everything synced to the music, so it was hard to tell if you played 'correctly' or 'incorrectly.' Taking a strong stance and prioritizing making sure players understand how to play and it doesn't matter if you play 'incorrectly,' it should just feel good was an important decision by the director. Those with musical experience would say things like, "This game is too easy, everything is just on the beat!" and the director would explain why keeping it as-is was important. 2. There were lots of parodies and references, so there was a lot of back and forth into making it work for both Japan and internationally. (One thing that didn't quite work in Japanese was Chai dressing up as a shark.) For all you Japanese users out there, you might want to search for "Left Shark." That refernce before the beginning of track 10...we got permission for that! We worked hard to get the music player swinging back and forth perfectly. But having the director explain in what each joke was about was funny in itself! That's it for now! For all the players that gave us high praise, I am so thankful! Working through the pandemic was worrying, but watching lots of streamers and Vtubers helped me get through it. I found some of my favorites and it energized me! ----GameDesign/002/Thanks---- Hey there! To everyone who played Hi-Fi RUSH, and especially to those who are reading this message, I hope you enjoyed playing the game. Thank you! I joined the project when it was mostly done, and my first job was to play through the current version of the game. When I did, my first thought was, "Holy crap, this is good!" All the fun elements were already in, and I realized that all it needed was to be polished and finished! Polishing an already good game is a unique and challenging task—making it shine even more—but it was a lot of fun. I just hope the work we put in brought some brightness to your day. We put a lot of work into stuffing lots of easter eggs into the game. I put a really minor one, but I don't think it's been found yet... For all my Tango coworkers, my family, my cat who passed away during production (and was clever like 808), but most important, the fans of the game, I give my biggest thanks. ----GameDesign/003/Thanks---- Did you enjoy your time with Hi-Fi RUSH? If you got this far and are reading this message, you must have had a good time! I joined the project right when the pandemic hit, and we moved to remote work. I had only seen the other game designers in person. Everyone else was just pictures, and since I never met them, I had no idea what type of people they were. For about a year, I thought...maybe they aren't real people, but AIs? However, when we finally came back int he studio, I was relieved to see that they all really existed! I also want to just say that the soundtrack to the game gets you pumped up and works perfectly for this game concept. I thought the sound designers had such good sense, and I'm not the most informed in terms of music, so when talking about some of the licensed music int he game with the audio director and said, "I never heard of this band before," he was like, "How can you not know this??" After that, I signed up for a music subscription and started getting more into trying artists, so I think it's been a good opportunity for me! Haha. With all of that, I'm glad that so many users are enjoying the game. Thank you so much! From the Director ----Director/001/Thanks---- You've probably read through a lot of these messages, so I'll (try) to be brief. To all of you who played our title, and especially those who came all the way here to read this note, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. A project like this is as close to a labor of love as can be, and the team has gone above and beyond into creating a fun and exciting game for you to enjoy. To see people enjoy it and express positivity that matches exactly what we aimed to make is the most fulfilling thing a creator can see, so I am truly beyond words on how you have taken to this game. As a gift, I provide you with something I know you've been after this whole time: your gift basket. Hold it tight, because you aren't getting another one. Congratulations on playing through this journey, and I hope to see you again soon with what comes next.
Graffiti Graffiti can be found all throughout Vandelay, as a mysterious artist has vandalized the different buildings. Almost every track has at least one. Most of them depict parts of the track or an enemy faced recently/soon-to-be encountered in the track they're in. There are 23 to find, and collecting them all rewards you with a bit of dialogue, some cosmetics, and some graffiti in the hideout. Click here to see where you can find all of the graffiti! This will contain some spoilers and requires having some knowledge of the games tracks, so if you haven't beaten it, I would advise against looking at this. Track 1: A Fresh Start QA Building: Can only be found after beating the game. After you press the button that activates a moving platform that takes you across a gap, to the left is a Z-Shielded door. Behind this door is an area with a generator that you need to overheat with Korsica, activating the platforms that lead up to the area where the graffiti is. Once you climb up, it's on the wall to the left. Click here to see this graffiti! Crane Holding Up Containers: Can only be found after beating the game. Just before the QA-1MIL fight, if you climb up onto the upper platform to the left, there's a fire gate. Once you put it out with Korsica, climb up the crates inside to get to the upper area, then turn around and platform over to the wall that the graffiti is on. Click here to see this graffiti! Track 2: Power Up Production Machine: After pressing the button and climbing up the platforms it summons to keep progressing through the track, go to the left and break the boxes that are blocking the doorway there. Through that doorway and up the crates inside is where you will find the graffiti. Click here to see this graffiti! Rekka: In the room before the Rekka fight, go around the corner, by the SCR-UBs. It's on the wall to the right. Click here to see this graffiti! Robot Portrait: Can only be found after beating the game. If you walk further down the catwalk that the button that leads to progress is on, then go right, there's a grapple point that you can use to get up to a room full of boxes and barrels. There's a fire gate in this room, which, once you put it out, leads out to a catwalk that leads to pipes you can walk on. Following these pipes all the way, you'll reach the room that the graffiti is in. Click here to see this graffiti! Track 3: Trial By (Volcanic) Fire Volcano: Before you go into R&D, take a right, to the Kale statue. Jumping onto the upper area behind the statue, and walking around some rocks is where you'll find the graffiti. Click here to see this graffiti! Zanzo: After you go through the side route and then through the vent in it, jump on top of the vent cover. The graffiti is on the wall there. Click here to see this graffiti! Flowers: Can only be found after beating the game. Near a small camp where a PGR-0101 and a VA-SER are talking, behind the two bots is a Z-Shielded wall. Breaking through this wall and then platforming up to the upper area is where you will find the graffiti on the ground, near the Z-Shielded wall that leads back out. Click here to see this graffiti! Track 4: Less Budget, More Problems HG-0G: When you reach the stairs that lead up to the first AR room, go under the stairs. Behind some boxes and above some pallets is where you'll find the graffiti. Click here to see this graffiti! VÄART: After destroying the first AR eye, when you reach the crossroads on the catwalk, go left instead of right. At the end of the walkway, on the wall is where you'll find the graffiti. Click here to see this graffiti! Track 5: Breaking Out Nodes: After you reach the main security area, go right and drop down onto the platform below that leads to the moving platforms that circle around the center column. At the end of this platform is where you'll find the graffiti. Click here to see this graffiti! Track 6: L.I.F.T. Me Up L.I.F.T: Once you reach the shop, go left. It's on the floor. Click here to see this graffiti! Track 7: The Climb KEM-0N0: After you grapple over to the platform on the center column, instead of getting onto the moving platform that takes you toward the next part of the track, go left. Above some boxes is where you'll find it. Click here to see this graffiti! Lasers: After you get the lasers moving again, get past them, and go up the next jump pad, go behind the tube. You'll find it there on the floor. Click here to see this graffiti! Korsica: Can only be found after beating the game. Break through the Z-Shielded wall, then climb up to the upper platform in the room behind it to get to a fire gate. On the other side of this fire gate is a room, where you'll find Pmidge near the easel that the graffiti is on. Click here to see this graffiti! Track 8: A History Lesson Fireworks: In the upper part of the tracks opening area, before the fire gate, go toward the gate that the O5-KAR is polishing. Left of him is the graffiti, which is on the far wall. Click here to see this graffiti! BL-1Z5: After the fight in front of the museum, go through the gate/over the fence to the right. You'll find it on the wall near the museum. Click here to see this graffiti! Stage: After the fight against the WA-ES-2 and SEN-C0 and breaking through the Z-Shielded wall, look to the left. It's on the wall. Click here to see this graffiti! Museum: After the fight on the platform that fell down, drop down to the right of the stairs. It's on the floor there. Click here to see this graffiti! Track 9: Take the Stage Mimosa: At the very beginning of the track, turn around. It's on the wall to the right. Click here to see this graffiti! Track 10: A Master Plan WA-ES-2: After Smidge gets stuck in the door, allowing you to pass through, before you go into the vent, look behind you. It's on the wall there. Click here to see this graffiti! Wrench: In the atrium, before pressing the button that activates the grapple point that leads to progress, go up the platforms to the right. On the other side of the first wooden wall on this upper area, it's on the wall to the left. Click here to see this graffiti! Roquefort: After you climb onto the roof of the office that you had to break a Z-Shielded wall to get into, go around the divider, and then hop down to the balcony behind the fences. It's on the wall there. Click here to see this graffiti! Kale: Before you go into Roquefort's office, go to the right. It's on the wall there. Click here to see this graffiti! Click here to see the graffiti you get in the hideout after finding all of the ones throughout the tracks!